#18 - Saying 'Yes' in 2024.
Alongside my many intentions in living life wholeheartedly this year, saying yes more is one of them.
Last year, I went for my ever first concert. And as a person who always perceived that she wouldn’t enjoy concerts, interestingly it wasn’t with reluctance that I went for the Hans Zimmer concert, but rather curiosity.
Because by then, my own understandings of things I thought I’d enjoy and wouldn’t enjoy were being let go of.
But I digress.
I thought I wasn’t a ‘concert girl.’ As someone who gets stimulated by the outside noises of cars outside her apartment in Dubai, and considers herself fairly introverted, I felt very sure of my notion as well. And whenever anyone would care to argue my case I’d be determined that I knew myself better than anyone else.
It seems pretty obvious that my point will prove the opposite though, hey?
And it’s true. I was wrong.
Not only did I not turn out to be wrong about concerts, but I also realised that whilst I do know myself well, there’s still a lot to discover about myself as I allow myself to open up and flourish.
Over the last year, I’ve gone to 4 concerts. And enjoyed every single one of them, wholeheartedly, and thoroughly. Hans Zimmer, Farhan Akhtar, Bryan Adams, and Ed Sheeran, of which the latter most has been an artist I’ve wanted to see ever since I was in university over a decade ago.
I’m such a big fan of Ed Sheeran’s music, it was incomprehensible to me that I was able to witness such an awesome show. I say that about all the shows, but oh my goodness… I felt like I could cry from joy after I saw Ed Sheeran’s concert.
I think he’s absolutely incredible.
This was a piece I wrote after the concert:
I could cry.
I texted my friend right after the Ed Sheeran show and I told her that Ed Sheeran owns the stage and the crowd and it's by far the best show I've been to, having been to multiple concerts over the last year.
What a show.
Riveting.
Spellbinding.
Mesmerising.
And as such a massive fan of him, his songs were just... Everything. The way he sang them and how he takes over the stage. How he includes the audience and how absolutely passionate he is about his music is just incredible.
He shines so bright on stage.
It felt like such an honour to be able to witness him perform live. Moments where I could feel the music thumping and pulsing through every part of my body... The utter joy that filled through me took me both by thrill and surprise.
Surprise because I had to keep reminding myself that I was in fact watching Ed Sheeran perform live.
I'm losing words now. But I also wonder, how can I be at a loss for words?
And then I think of the lights.
The sound.
The sound of the crowd going WILD. The sound of his voice... And the power he holds to be able to captivate the audience.
It's always the same feeling after the concert.
How can life continue the same?
How can things seem normal when everything is twisting so beautifully within?
How powerful music is.
What a show. What a way to end my time here in Dubai. What a performance. ❤️🦋
Something I’ve realised ever since my first concert was what I brought up at the beginning: that I don’t think I know myself very well. I think I’ve made assumptions about things I would like and dislike based on what others have perceived about me.
Or what I’ve heard society deem what’s good and bad.
Or something else external in some manner.
So, over the last year I started asking myself": “What do I want to try more of?”
It started off with the dance floor, moving my body in ways I didn’t think was possible with hip hop classes. I’ve also started listening to myself more when I was travelling, which I’m aware has reflected in my writing.
Because slowing down while travelling in the spaces of nature has allowed me to connect to myself more.
It’s been such a fascinating journey so far. And I’ll be honest, it hasn’t been easy. There are times I get in my own way and the mental blocks come up, and I do one of two things in these scenarios:
I ask myself where the discomfort is coming from and find a solution based on that; more often than not my body asks me to be patient with her.
If the pattern doesn’t feel too strong I push myself out of my comfort zone a little.
2023 was the beginning of a lot of this. And this is something I’m looking forward to continuing in 2024.
I want to say yes to experiences I have a prior perception that I may not enjoy and build my own opinion.
Because more often than not…
I won’t know unless I actually try.
Also, perceptions and opinions change over time. I don’t want to be so rigid as to believe that something I’ve said in previous years due to previous experiences will align with the version I am today.
Because I am ever evolving. And I want to be ever evolving and open to new experiences.
I will add, as a note of love to myself:
I will not push myself out of my own boundaries as an act of unkindness. I will choose to be patient with myself and honour the place I’m at. My saying yes is to grow as a person and experience more of life, but it is not to take away the space of self-love I’ve built within myself.
If you’d like to read more about my intentions for 2024, you can find my post talking more about that here.
On another note, I can’t believe that we’re one month down into the new year.
I can’t wait for the rest.
I am sending you hope and warmth for everything happening to you.
With lots of love and sunshine,
Athira